Horse People, Please Stop Being Mean On The Internet
As a millennial, I’ve grown up with the Internet. My brother and I would fight over who got to sit on the office desk chair in our grandmother’s guest bedroom as we listened to the alien noises the desktop PC made when it connected to AOL.
In high school, I texted on my phone using just the number keypad. So I had to hit the number “5” three times to get to the letter “L.”
Nowadays, everything is on the Internet. It’s great, right? So much information right at our fingertips. My horse care books sit collecting dust on the shelf because why pull out one of those when I can just Google icing techniques or ask for feed recommendations in a horsey Facebook group?
The older I get, the more I realize “the Internet” is a double-edged sword. Especially when it comes to said Facebook groups.
Over the years Facebook has connected me with so many knowledgeable horse people. Some live nearby and others I’d never get to meet if it wasn’t for social media. It’s a great place to crowd source problems or ask questions.
Well… Sometimes it is.
The thing about horse people is that everyone has different learned experiences. This is great, until two people don’t agree on a methodology or treatment plan or training technique. Then all hell breaks loose and I’m dizzy from a PTSD flashback of a previous Facebook fight over Donald Trump with my Uncle Mitch.
For example, I noticed my OTTB was losing a little bit of weight a couple of months ago. Nothing had changed in his daily routine. I had worked hard to come up with a feed regiment that balanced his needs with his tricky illnesses. It wasn’t easy to strike the right balance.
I posted in an equine nutrition Facebook group for advice. Maybe some fresh eyes on our situation would be helpful in identifying what I should do next. I uploaded a photo of my horse, wrote a description about him, what he eats and his needs, and eagerly hoped for the best.
Well, the thread devolved into a bunch of people I don’t know, who don’t know my horse, or my farm, or the professionals I work with on my horse’s health needs, criticizing me and picking apart every decision I ever made. A few of the commenters were actual acquaintances.
I decided that I don’t need this kind of BS in my life and deleted the post. When I did, I received a sternly worded message from an admin in the group. Whoa Nelly.
I understand Facebook isn’t a perfect mode of communication. It’s easy to make assumptions of tone and intent when you’re just reading a stranger’s name and explanation on a screen. But why can’t we be nicer to each other?
There are few Facebook groups that have a kind, funny, easy going nature about them. And that makes me sad.
Instead of getting defensive, can we collectively, as a unified group of people who love our animals, take a step back and realize that the person who posted a particular question or idea is just looking for kind, non-threatening feedback?
That Facebook thread left a sour taste in my mouth. So I called my vet next. Nothing was wrong with my horse. We realized shortly after that he’d found a post the electric wire of the pasture fencing didn’t touch, and was cribbing all night on it. That’s why he’d lost a little bit of weight. Wearing his cribbing collar at night solved the problem.
I do wonder if those people who commented on my post would call my horse “malnourished” to my face. My guess is, probably not.