How I Get It Done: Managing The Chaotic Mess
It happens to everyone – days don’t always go as planned. Deadlines come up. A kid gets sick. Projects require extra time to get done. That means a lesson gets cancelled.
Juggling a horse habit on top of work, family and everything else, can be exhausting some days.
We get it. Heels Down is celebrating the adult amateurs who understand the struggle. Life gets in the way of riding sometimes, no matter how much we wish it didn’t. Read on for stories from real riders on how they get it done.
Amy Vodraska, 51, Boonton, New Jersey
What do you do?
I’m a publisher of a trade magazine. Outside of publisher’s duties, I manage the magazine and its financials and oversee a 21-state sales region. I also manage an annual event for the magazine.
How many kids do you have?
I have two – both ride. My son just graduated from Northeastern University and was captain of his equestrian team. My daughter plays soccer at William & Mary. She also still rides. Sharing this passion with my kids made parenting really cool. It took our relationship to another level. Now that they’re both in college, I’m not going to lie, it’s super hard.
How many hours would you say you work a week?
I work 7-5 or 8-5 daily, and I bust out at 5 to go to the barn. It takes about 40 minutes to get to the barn. In sales season, I’ll usually work some in the evenings. When you’re in sales, there are no breaks. I’ll park my butt in front of the TV and get the mindless stuff out of the way.
Tell us more about your horses.
Indy is an Oldenburg. He’s 13, but mentally he’s 7. He was very spoiled when we got him. He never had a job. There was a time when we seriously considered changing his show name to “D**khead”. It was a learning experience for me, as an adult ammie, to bring along this young horse. My trainers were super helpful and he does have a good brain, but he is not a push button horse. He was absolutely a family project – both of my kids rode him. My daughter was the one who logged a lot of his green miles in the hunters and equitation.
How often do you ride a week?
I ride 5-6 days a week. I’m pretty hardcore. The reason it works for me is that my husband is super supportive. He realizes this is my sanity. He needs to go to the gym or he’s no fun. I need to see my pony or I’m no fun.
Do you consider yourself competitive?
I get nervous and get in my head a lot. My son tries to get me to laugh. He tries to pump me up… like with Karate Kid, “You’re the Best Around.” I compete almost to challenge myself. I enjoy being with my friends from the barn and the whole team. I compete because I’m scared and to confront that fear. I don’t care much about the results. When the results are good, I’m happy of course. But my favorite part of it is the process moreso than the competition.
How do you force yourself to be OK with not getting everything done in a day?
I have really good intentions. There are times when I get home and I still have stuff to do. When I was younger, I would force myself to do it. You can’t jerk around with deadlines, you just need to get it done. And then there are other times when I’ll grab a pint of ice cream and go and watch Netflix with my husband. Sometimes you have to lay down the line. I don’t know if I’m good at it. But there are times when I can say screw it, and other times I’m running around in a chaotic mess.
How do you stay motivated to reach your riding goals?
I think it’s just the passion. My Everest is to jump three feet again. I do things to myself that are scary and then I get mad at myself for not doing them. I was terrified to haul my horse on my own, for example, but I made myself do it because I want to do it. I might drive an hour out of my way not to back the trailer up, but I do it. I don’t want to be reliant on anyone. But there’s this eternal frustration of realizing I’m not there yet. You know those rides when you get off are just psyched afterward because it went so well? That’s what keeps me motivated. I want to get to three feet again. But if I don’t, it’s not the worst thing in the world.
This series originally published in the Heels Down Spark newsletter in June 2021. Sign up now for the Spark to read more stories like this first, delivered to your inbox.