Confessions Of An “Overthinker”
By Rebecca Barber
Who here tends to overthink? You know who you are. Do you psych yourself out and make the simplest of tasks more complicated than they need to be? Have you ever spent an inordinate amount of time drafting a two-sentence text message or missed out on what could have been a great opportunity because you were worried about how they would respond? I plead guilty.
I’m getting better about some things but I also know that at times I still struggle to get out of my own head. That is why I want to share with you five important lessons that I have learned the hard way.
1. You will not, and cannot, please everyone.
It is impossible to make everyone happy all of the time. Regardless of your good intentions there will always be people who will gossip about your actions and question your decisions. Don’t allow them to make you second-guess yourself.
2. Ride for yourself.
It is incredibly easy to become overwhelmed by the pressures of competing. But just remember that riding is supposed to be fun. If it isn’t enjoyable, take a step back and reevaluate. Would you be happier in a different program? Are you interested in trying a new discipline? There is no shame in taking a break and figuring out where your true passion lies.
3. Find a way to periodically “turn off” your brain.
Personally, I know that I flat my horse better when I am listening to music. That tiny bit of distraction stops me from overthinking and allows me to ride more off of feel. I have also learned that when practicing a new skill I am more likely to find success when riding in a field, away from people, as opposed to a busy ring. Overcoming your tendency to overthink is largely about finding ways to distract your brain so that your body can take over.
4. Understand that not every ride will be perfect.
Equestrian sports are frustrating. One day you may feel like you are on the top of the world, while the next day you might struggle to correctly perform the simplest of tasks. While it is easier said than done, try not to focus too heavily on the negatives.
5. Recognize and accept that being an “overthinker” also has its perks.
“Overthinkers” tend to possess excellent problem solving skills. We also tend to be very good at analyzing and strategizing. When we take control of and positively utilize this trait, overthinking can become a valuable and useful tool to possess, aiding us in achieving our goals.