Be Your Own Ted Lasso

Rebecca: Do you believe in ghosts, Ted?

Ted: I do. But more importantly, I believe they need to believe in themselves.

The character of Ted Lasso originally began as a NBC promotion for the Premier League in the United States nearly a decade ago. NBC was about to be the exclusive television host of the biggest football (soccer) league in the world in 2013, and like many Premier League fans, I was thrilled to have access to every match for the first time. My love for one club in particular, Arsenal FC, is the inspiration behind the name of my adopted off-track Thoroughbred Gunner.

Seven years after Ted was a comical promo, a show fully dedicated to Ted premiered on Apple TV, and I Initially tuned in to “Ted Lasso” for the football and my love for England. I kept watching and re-watching for the same reason all the other fans of the show have: the humor, honesty, and hope. There is a lot behind that famous locker room “Believe” sign, but the primary purpose is clear. Ted wants AFC Richmond, a fictional football club, to believe in themselves and the team.

Imagine a “Believe” sign in your tack room as you reflect on who believes in you and your horse. What I’m learning is how important it is that I believe in myself as a horsewoman and a rider before worrying about other people’s belief in us. What is important is that I believe in my horse and put him first.

There are days when I wonder if others believe we can accomplish our goals, or if others believe there will always be a major obstacle holding us back. There are days
I wonder how to keep moving forward or how to convince others we are worth their belief. There are days when it seems no one is behind us. It does not truly matter to me if people believe in me as a rider as much as it matters to me that people believe in my young horse’s potential, and I take any criticism of him incredibly hard. Like a parent who seems to know a secret about how gifted their child is, I have a profound hope that others see my five-year-old green bean as I do.

Sometimes, we take a lack of compliments for us or our horses the same as criticism. Silence can create as much worry as heavy words. Regardless, it is not uncommon to feel hurt when someone expresses negative thoughts about your horse. If we are full of pride and gratitude when people see greatness in our horses, then it’s understandable that the opposite could be true. Our sport is incredibly hard, and we need the support of fellow riders and barnmates to cope with the difficulties and celebrate the milestones. Their belief in us when we feel frustrated or stuck can motivate us to continue trying and working hard.

I feel encouraged when others see my horse’s talents and athleticism, as well as his goofy personality. I often state, “he’s not just a handsome face” after he shows off a floaty trot or a balanced canter. On the other hand, my heart can sink and lead to a feeling of defeat when it seems only our problems are visible, whether his or mine. The true challenge is to do as Ted Lasso hopes ghosts do: believe in myself.

Without a doubt, I believe in who my horse is today, and who he will be in the future. I believe every ride is a good ride, and being his partner is one of the greatest joys and honors in my life. I need to channel all of that and let my belief in him be louder than my perception of other people’s belief in him or me. Ted Lasso also encourages his players to “have the memory of a goldfish.” They have the shortest memory, a grand total of ten seconds, and I need to work on releasing worries to truly believe in myself even half as much as I believe in my horse.

Perhaps believing in ourselves like ghosts ought to and maintaining a goldfish’s memory will build more resiliency in us as riders. Let’s be our own Ted Lasso. Believe in yourself, believe in your horse, and ensure your barnmates know you believe in their horses and them. As long as Gunner knows he is safe, loved, trusted, and heard, I am doing right by him. That’s how he knows he has his own. Ted Lasso who does all she can to leave her troubles at the mounting block.